3 ways to prep your voice for tricky conversations

Here are three important ways to use your voice BEFORE having the tricky, boundary setting and advocacy conversations that you dream of one day having…

1) Use your voice in gentle/free ways and hear your voice in its lightness. By this I mean hear yourself laugh, hear yourself sing to your child, hear yourself whisper to your partner, speak easily with a friend, read out loud, sing like no one’s listening etc.

Do the easy things with your voice and actually tune in to the sound of your voice in these easier moments. This will remind you that the easy/free/in flow voice does exist and is right here waiting for you.

2) Use your voice to express emotions, as for most of us emotional expression comes more easily than cognitive discussion does, and this is true for all of us in a trauma response or experiencing survival mode.

This doesn’t mean you HAVE to cry, and if you’re shut down crying may be the last vocal expression you get to. But laughing, sighing, yelling, howling, panting etc are great ways of expelling pent up emotions which may make cognitive conversation more difficult to access.

3) Talk with someone who understands the conversation you want to have and who you already know is on your side or will support you no matter what. This might be a trusted friend, family member, therapist, online friend etc.

This gives you the opportunity to practice your words without the innate defensiveness that will often bubble up in tricky conversations and work out which phrases and words get your point across the best. You can think of this as a rehearsal.

There are many, many ways to use your voice as a tool for trauma recovery, and these are only three of them!

Our voice is available, when we find a place to meet with it xx